There has always seemed to be some great big secret about the female orgasm and how women can achieve an intense and massive one. Many women have gone their entire lives without one, leaving their partner frustrated because they cannot help them achieve this so much wanted release. Their wait and frustration is now over. This article will tell you some simple tips on how to help your woman achieve an ultimate orgasm while pleasuring yourself at the same time.

First off you both have to relax. One of the many reasons women fail to achieve orgasms is they feel as if they are thought of as sexual objects. Women think of sex as an emotional and physical experience. So by relaxing and taking your time with your partner and letting her know you do care about her will help her to better enjoy herself and achieve a more relaxed state. Female orgasms take place as much in the mind as they do in the body.

Next, you should always include plenty of foreplay. You need to keep in mind that there are many erogenous zones aside from the obvious ones. As much as eighty percent of women do not feel their partners kiss them enough, so make sure this is at the top of your list. The neck is an excellent erogenous zone to start with.

Try kissing or gently nibbling up and down her neck. This is sure to get them aroused. Try stroking her bottom or gently kissing to show her there is nothing to be self-conscious about. Most women have great anxiety about there behinds and the more you let them know you love it the more they will be able to relax and enjoy your exploring. Once they are fully relax and enjoying your touch, intense orgasm can be easily achieved.

Another thing to add is oral sex. Women love oral sex and many women can orgasm easily just from oral sex than actual sexual intercourse. It brings great pleasure by clitoris stimulation of her sensitive G Spot. In fact, it helps her achieve multiple orgasms with continuous stimulation. With this in mind, take your time. Oral sex does not simply mean a quick lick and you are done. The longer the oral sex lasts the more in tune your partner will be. Ten to fifteen minutes is a good rule of thumb.

Make sure to go slow during lovemaking! As most men know, women frequently complain that male partners get off too quickly. Try to slow down or even try to change up the pace. Go slow at times, fast at others, and then slow back down. A little teasing always goes a long way. Breathe deeply and slowly as this will help to prolong sex and help you to synchronize your breathing. This is a very erotic technique to try in aiding her to achieve that ultimate orgasm.

To learn more about female orgasm, grab your free copy of My Only Sex Guide – For Men today at http://www.MyOnlySexGuide.com

#4 Training Reasons

One of the most interesting phenomenons I’ve witnessed in dealing with human sexuality is the ability of people to train themselves into having an orgasm. Any one who has ever masturbated has engaged in a selftraining program which has taught them how to orgasm. Before we talk about female training, I’ll give you an example from male sexuality.

I worked with a male once who was a regular masturbator. During masturbation, he fantasized about having his partner bent over the edge of a couch and engaging in rear penetration, not anal sex. For months he used this same fantasy to help him reach orgasm during masturbation. This affected his sex life. When he was having sex with his partner, he found that he was losing his erection and finding it difficult to climax in any other position. The only way he was able to reach orgasm during actual sex was by imitating what he had been doing in his masturbation fantasies.

Essentially, he had trained himself about how to get off. Men are not the only ones who train themselves. In fact, the training men do usually does not interfere with their ability to reach an orgasm during actual intercourse. With women, it’s different. Women train themselves in two ways. First, they train themselves to reach orgasm using specific techniques. Second, they train themselves for each orgasm using certain fantasies. Let’s talk about both of these.

When women begin masturbating, they do tend to try multiple ways of accomplishing the goal. Once they find something that works then they stick to it. Let me give you an example. One woman I worked with had been masturbating with a vibrator for about ten years. She had to use the same vibrator every time because she claimed no other vibrator could bring her to orgasm. With sexual partners, she would fake orgasm then excuse herself to the bathroom where she would reach a real orgasm using her vibrator. After a decade of relying on the same toy and the same technique to reach orgasm, this young woman had taught her body how to have an orgasm.

Since her partner’s penis was not her vibrator, it was not capable of doing the job. To his credit, he did try a variety of things to help her but the problem really wasn’t his alone to fix. She had to re-train her body. The second method of training often begins even before a woman ever masturbates. As soon as girls begin fantasizing about men, they are beginning to train their bodies about how to reach orgasm. I have another example to share which illustrates this fact as well. A woman I worked with had been relying on the same fantasies during masturbation for almost two decades. Her preference were rape fantasies in which she was the victim and was non-violently coerced into having intercourse with multiple partners.

The fantasies involved different scenarios, locations, and men but the basics were all the same. Even when she tried to have other fantasies, they would always end up deteriorating into a rape fantasy before she was able to orgasm. The only time she was able to reach an orgasm with her husband was when they attempted to act out her fantasy. Like the other woman, she had to re-train her mind about what turned her on and what would lead her to an orgasm.

The reason I’m sharing these stories with you is because orgasm training is one of the biggest, yet most often unrecognized, reasons for women’s difficulties in reaching an orgasm. The only way to break free of that old training is through experimentation. The more the two of you try different things the more likely she is to find something else that can help her climax.

What You Need to Remember

Keep in mind as you read the next two chapters that there are a number of reasons why women may have more difficulty reaching an orgasm than men will. Those reasons include social pressures not to enjoy sex, a lack of trust in the relationship, anatomical differences between men and women, and limited orgasm training.

Understanding what may be hampering your sexual relationship will help you determine the best course of action to take in order to enjoy mutually satisfying sex.

Female Orgasm and Foreplay

For men who want to please their partners, foreplay is not optional. I make that point because I’ve worked with lots of men who hated foreplay and just wanted to get down to business without realizing that foreplay has an important role in female orgasm. I’ve also worked with men who enjoy foreplay just as much as the women in their lives. What’s important to realize is that foreplay should be about what makes her feel good because at this point you’re probably already in a state of arousal. She is probably not at that point yet.

In this we’re first going to discuss the female sexual arousal cycle and compare it to yours. Then, we’ll look at some types of foreplay which you can try with your partner in order to help her become physically and psychologically ready to orgasm.

Here are 11 facts all men must know about female orgasms and satisfying a woman sexually:

Women can experience 2 different kinds of orgasms namely clitoral (the most common and the one most women are familiar with) and vaginal (less common).

A few women can’t orgasm at all.

The majority of women can only orgasm from having their clitoris stimulated manually, orally or with a vibrator.

Less than half of all women can have vaginal orgasms. They can learn with training and practice, but most don’t know how.

Since most women must have clitoral stimulation, they don’t climax during intercourse unless additional stimulation is provided to the clitoris.

For more than half of all women, their ability to orgasm has absolutely nothing to do with the size of a man’s penis.

For the women that can have vaginal orgasms, they generally have 2 kinds: the cul-de-sac orgasm or the G-spot orgasm. Most women who can have a cul-de-sac orgasm can also have G-spot orgasms. The cul-de-sac is located deeper inside up behind the cervix. While stimulation of the cul-de-sac can be pleasurable most women do not like the feel of the cervix being touched with a probing finger or bumped with a long penis. A 5 inch penis is usually long enough to reach the cul-de-sac depending on the woman.

The other vaginal orgasm comes by stimulating the G-spot. It is not really a spot but more of an area located a couple of inches along the front wall of the vagina. Depending on the woman the G-spot area can be as small as a pea or as large as silver dollar. The G-spot responds to firm pressure and gentle tapping. This can be a drawback because when the G-spot is stimulated she my feel she has to urinate. Stimulation of the G-spot often causes fluid to build up in the Skene’s glands or female prostrate. Many women are uncomfortable with the sensation of fluid build up and are afraid the fluid they release is urine. Numerous studies have confirmed the fluid or female ejaculate is not urine but is akin to prostrate fluid found in male ejaculate. And like a man’s, her ejaculation fluids can “squirt” out from the urethra during orgasm and is completely normal.

A man does not need a long penis to give a woman who is capable a vaginal orgasm. In most cases a 5 inch long penis is all that is required for a G-spot or cul-de-sac orgasm.

Girth or thickness is NOT a significant factor in satisfying a woman. While some women enjoy the “stretched like a water balloon” feeling, most women do not. To large a girth can cause pain during sex. Men of average or small girth may be concerned if they do not feel the vagina tight around their penis and the vagina feels too loose and does not provide enough stimulation. This situation is much more effectively remedied by the women strengthening her pelvic muscles than by a man trying to add girth which may be possible but the process takes months.

Whereas a woman can strengthen and tighten her “grip” in just a few weeks. The stronger the pelvic muscles the stronger the orgasms and the tighter the “grip” during sex. The ezCOME (easy Clinical Orgasm Muscle Exerciser) is an excellent way for a woman to strengthen her PC and pelvic muscles. A man would be much better off purchasing an ezCOME for a woman that wasting money on questionable male enhancement products.

Women with very strong pelvic muscles can easily orgasm vaginally just by flexing their muscles, with or without a penis inside. They can also flex their muscles around an inserted penis and give a man wonderful sensations. The point is a man’s penis size is not as important as a woman’s vaginal strength when it comes to a woman’s orgasm. It is the tapping sensation that triggers a vaginal orgasm and not the stretching and filling up sensation. Hitting the right spot in a tight and toned vagina is more important than size.

Real women generally need a minimum of 5 to 10 minutes of direct, consistent and skilled clitoral stimulation to have a clitoral orgasm. In porn the women are shown having multiple vaginal orgasms within moments of penetration. While such orgasmic abilities are possible, such women are rare, and the instant multiple orgasms portrayed in porn are pretended. In the real world women typically react very differently than the stylized porn queens. Also all the men in porn are huge and their size has nothing to do with the fake orgasms of their co stars. Remember they are actors. Don’t make the mistake of thinking your size has anything to do with your woman’s orgasms.

Men sometimes find these female orgasm facts hard to believe. Men will get much more out of sex by focusing on their sex skills and her pelvic muscle tone rather than worrying about the size of his penis.

No it’s not that kind of trick.

Dr. Louanne C. Weston, a board certified sex therapist, explains that around 10 percent of women have never had an orgasm, either alone or with a partner. Some of these unfortunate ladies are smart enough to recognize the problem and seek a solution. The good news, according to Dr. Weston, is it is possible for a woman to learn to be orgasmic.

The most important thing a woman needs to know to make achieving an orgasm easier is to learn how to properly balance the amount of tension and relaxation during sex. You may be wondering how you can be both tense and relaxed at the same time.

The key thing to understand here is the difference between muscle tension and stress tension. Stress tension is the tightness in your neck, shoulders and sometimes your back caused by mental worries and life’s stresses. It is a good idea to relax and release the stress tension built up in your neck and shoulders with massage and relaxation exercises before sex. But trying to remain totally relaxed during sex will make having an orgasm difficult.

A woman needs a fair amount muscle tension to reach orgasm, especially when she is first learning how. Most women first learn to orgasm while tightening their leg, stomach and butt muscles. Once a woman learns to climax this way she will continue to need use these muscles to provide the tension she needs for orgasm until she learns a better and easier way.

The best orgasm inducing muscles for women to tense up are the muscles in her lower pelvic region. These are the same muscle used to stop the flow of urine. Developing conscience control of contracting or tensing these pelvic floor muscles makes getting the right amount of orgasm inducing muscle tension easy.

When the pelvic flour muscles are tensed or flexed the blood flow to the genitals increases. This not only increases a woman’s arousal, her increased awareness and control of these muscles heightens her sensitivity to sexual stimulation.

When a woman has correctly developed her pelvic floor muscles through regular pelvic exercise, using a pelvic exerciser such as the ezCOME (easy Clinical Orgasm Muscle Exerciser) not only can she consciously build the muscle tension and arousal needed to make her orgasm happen, she also enjoys greater unconscious pelvic muscle tension and contractions during sexual stimulation. Women with well developed pelvic floor muscle often enjoy many spontaneous orgasms during sex. This is a fact I can personally verify.

Here is where the right kind of relaxation is important. A woman needs to learn to relax her mind during sex. She needs to block out the mental distractions, like the ones that give her the neck and shoulder stress tension mentioned earlier, so she can focus on the sensations of sexual pleasure.

The best way to get rid of orgasm blocking stress is to replace it with sex positive images and words. For example as she is being stimulated (either by herself or a partner) she can picture in her mind a passionate or erotic scene from her favorite romance novel or movie with her and her lover in the leading roles.

She can first picture in her mind the scene as if she is watching from a distance and then mentally change her perspective and imagine she is experiencing it in person.

Or she can repeat the words “This feels really good” and “ I can take as long as I need” in her mind as she is stimulated.

These techniques keep the mind occupied with thoughts that encourage sexual arousal and enjoyment and keep out negative thoughts. Think of it as daydreaming about sex during sex so you can enjoy sex.

Once the distracting thoughts have been replaced with sex positive thoughts, pelvic floor muscle contractions are added. With practice most women can learn to tense their pelvic floor muscles and build sexual orgasmic tension while letting their minds go silent. They are then free to be in the moment with their partner as they build up to one or several orgasms.

The physical and mental exercises described help many women having difficulty with orgasm. A medical condition or medications can also interfere with a woman’s orgasm ability. Ask your doctor for more information about these.

The sex therapist designed ezCOME strengthens pelvic muscles and increases orgasms. It comes with a diet program designed to increase a woman’s libido and orgasms.